It was a hard lesson to learn, but I learned it. He was 17 and I was 15. He was on the football team and I was a cheerleader. It seemed like a relationship straight out of one of those teenager romance books. The whole relationship seemed almost too good to be true….and, it was. The best part of the whole thing was that it wasn’t just a story, it was my life and things were great until it happened. In my wildest dreams, I never thought that I would be in a situation where we only did it once, but got pregnant.
My boyfriend and I had never hooked up like most of our other couple friends. We both were kind of religious and had decided early on that we would wait before we did the big “it”. He never pressured me and I never really thought that sex had to be a part of our “storybook” relationship.
Then, one night, after we had gone to a movie with another couple, I got this strange feeling in my gut. I should have followed it, but I just kind of shrugged it off. We went back to the other girls’ house, where her parents were out of town. They made a beeline for her bedroom. And as for us, well, one thing let to another and the next thing that I know, I was doing the big “it”. To be honest, he didn’t “pressure” me. I kind of wanted to do it and so, it happened without any birth control.
The next month rolled around and there I was…looking for and hoping to see my period. Nothing. Another couple of weeks rolled by and still, nothing. There I was, stuck thinking to myself, “I only did it one time and I’m pregnant”! What in the world was I going to do!? I know that it only takes one time to have unprotected sex and you absolutely can get pregnant, but I was floored. I couldn’t believe it! It seemed unreal. You always hear about these other girls that are doing it all the time and nothing seems to happen to them. Then when it came to me, we only did it once and I’m pregnant!
I told my boyfriend. He wanted to get married and do the right thing. But, I told him that I was too young. I was only 16! I was not ready to be anybody’s wife and I definitely was not ready to be anybody’s mother. So, I had to figure out what I would do.
Being kind of religious left me with few options because I knew that I was not going to have an abortion. So, finally, after talking to my school counselors and my mother, who was just as understanding, furious, confused, and uncomfortable as I was with the whole situation, I decided that I would place this child for adoption. There are so many people out there that want to have a child and here I was, 16 years old and a former virgin that had the dubious honor of only doing it once and getting pregnant. It took some getting used to the idea and having a baby was not easy by any means, but it was my decision.
My boyfriend is still my boyfriend. Believe it or not, we haven’t done “it” since. Call it shell-shocked or just plain paranoid, but we realize that we don’t have to do what others are doing to be happy together. We talk about the “what ifs” sometimes, but for the most part, we are happy that we got a second chance to continue to be “storybook” teenagers! We are also happy that the child was placed in a loving home and will have a better life.
So, take it from me, don’t think that it can’t happen to you. We only did once and I did get pregnant.
This story was excerpted from USAAdoptions.com.
If you find yourself in a situation like Stephanie’s, you can learn more about open adoption by visiting OpenAdoption.com. If you have questions, please call Pregnancy Help Online at 1-800-923-6784.